A Secret Never Told
by strawberry poo kmoo
Summary: A sadish oneshot for now. Mystery pairing until the very end. Kind of random... I wrote it a while ago. Minimal 'swearing', PG13 just to be safe. I'd enjoy some feedback . Kind of cliffhangerish because it was originally going to be something akin t


A/N: I wrote this quite a long time ago last summer… And … I dunno. A mixture of boredom, and feeling bad for my reviewers who have to wait forever for any updates made me want to post this. It was originally going to be a multi-chapter fic, but I'm going to leave it as just a one-shot for now. Since there's no way I can possibly promise any more chapters, seeing as this was my original version of what is now Lifecycle. So, read. At least its a lot less confusing than Lifecycle… lmao. Characters actually interact with each other! Gasp! Umm… yeah. I'm leaving in the original A/N's because I'm lazy. Ahahahah.

Woo! My first fanfic on here! Fun! Anyways… I hereby disclaim this piece. Unlike many authors, I'm glad not to own ffix. If I did… the world would be a very sad place. Oh yeah. This piece has slash, or yaoi or shounen-ai or whatever you feel like calling it. If you're a homophobe or something… that was your warning. Anyways. Now that I'm done with that, lets get onto… :in deep, booming narrator voice:

_**A Secret Never Told**_

A lot of people assume that I'm in love with Garnet. That never was, and never will be true. Unless of course, someone made him switch bodies with her. I'd still be in love with _him_ though, right? He'd just be in a different body. A body that I wouldn't mind shagging every once in a while.

Many people assume lust grew to love, that our grand adventure drew us closer. That isn't true for us, but is certainly true for _us_.

Every day I missed him. Longed for his touch, his words. I never cried though, I left that job to my dick. Everybody assumed that those moans coming from my bunk were for her. Everybody assumed those advances were entirely straightforward. They never expected that every word, every action, was for him. I pretended that he was the one I was holding, the one I was touching, then the angry retort of her voice flung me back into reality, a reality I wasn't ready to face yet, one that I couldn't believe I had helped create. One where we weren't together.

I used to wonder, why on Gaia I ever left him for her. I guess the righteous part of me - or the part that still wanted to get her in bed - made me go. If only I knew I wouldn't see him again for so long… but that doesn't matter now. I shift a bit in his arms, looking down at his beautiful face. How I missed it. I bend down and kiss his forehead lightly.

"Zidane…?" he mumbles groggily, " what's goin' on?"

"Just thinkin' babe…" I say gently, ruffling his hair.

"About me?" he asks coyly, clearly more awake.

"Who else?" I chuckle, kissing him again on the top of his head.

"… It really sucks about that chick, you know…" he says lightly, gaining an air of seriousness.

"Which one?" I ask playfully, trying to keep up a light attitude, not quite ready for the conversation I knew was coming next.

"The one that's totally crazy about you with the two insane guards," he says sadly, with a little sigh.

"Yeah…" I agree. "I'm such an idiot for being the way I was around her…" I trail off, wishing I could just stay here with my love forever, with no worries of over-emotional princesses and their murderous knights.

"You don't have to go back to her, you know…" pain laced in his voice, I can tell I'm not the only one who's wished this was only a bad dream several hundred times.

I ponder this for a bit. I don't _have_ to go back to her, but somehow… it feels wrong not to. No matter how much I hate the girl for loving me, I can't deal with knowing that I'll make her go through the pain I did. "I can't deal with the guilt…" I say sadly. "We should rest up though, tomorrow's the big day." I don't want to talk about this anymore.

He sighs heavily. "Yeah…. Isn't there any way I can talk you out of this?"

I shake my head sadly. "I think my conscience feels like making up for lost time or something… I just can't…sorry…. But don't ever forget Blank, _you're_ the one I love. Nothing could _ever _change that."

"I know," the soft reply comes from next to me. "'Night Zidane…" he says, giving me a little peck on the cheek.

"'Night Blank…" I whisper.

I go to sleep, wondering for the millionth time; how the hell did I ever let this happen to me?

* * *

ok! Well… yeah. Sorry if that totally stank. Its summer. I'm tired. My brain has left the building from utter boredom. Read and Review, and Please

L-E-A-S-E, give some constructive criticism. Or just plain criticism. You don't have to know how to hammer. If anyone flames… I'll just pretend its criticism, cos it is! Ok that was weird… now I know I need a brain donor. Nighty-night folks. Oh yeah. I know the title stinks. In the morning… I'll go poo and when I come home… I'll edit this. Or something. Whatever.

Wow. After re-reading this, I really don't think that it DOES need to be edited… and that what my dad said about me being good at writing dialogue was true… I'm not sure I'm quite as good at it any more though… Lol. Well then. : cough : sorry for these long weird A/N's. I will go now XD


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